Reading My 2020 Aura Via My Top Songs 2020 Spotify Playlist
One’s music preferences are almost as powerful as one’s astrological sign (for those who are steadfast believers, that is). It’s almost cosmic. Sure, you could look at someone’s Facebook page or Instagram profile, or even, Venmo feed. This will tell you a fair amount about whoever you are dealing with. But music never lies. Music is “beyond human,” as one of my high school drama teachers used to say. It grows and shows spirituality and beliefs. It takes you back to the past or back to a person who has long left this earth.
With all that said, I thought it would be particularly interesting to see how music preferences have shifted throughout a seismic year, using myself as a case study. Let’s start with my most listened song, Motion by Soda Blonde. This one is, quite fittingly, from their latest EP, Isolation Content. For months, I was singing:
Hold me now the deep night has no right
to bring back my sanity
I've been trying to lose my mind in you all of the time
It’s a drug.
The actual chorus?:
Hold me now the deep night has no right
to bring back my sanity
I’ve been trying to lose my mind nearly all of the time
It’s a joke.
It’s almost like a dream revealing the inner-workings of my conscience. Who was I losing my mind in? Who was I thinking about? Who did I not want to think about? Deep, right? When I realized what the real lyrics to the song were, I realized what I had been feeling all along: a recent breakup, a deep dive back into a familiar face from my past, losing my mind, and it goes on and on and on….
This artist was also my most listened to artist of 2020. I was first introduced to Soda Blonde in November 2019. My then-boyfriend took me to their concert on the second floor of some thrift shop in Hackney. I loved this band, and I didn’t want to admit that I loved them. If so, it would have been the only band he and I shared a love for. I also didn’t like listening to music at the time because I feared I would be made fun of by him. For this reason, I wonder what you would find if you looked back at my Top Songs 2019 playlist. This is probably one that Spotify had to work massively for. Nonetheless, it’s still interesting that Soda Blonde managed to be my favorite band. And, not only that, but it was the band that helped me move on from him.
Another trend I notice throughout this playlist is effort and big gestures. Songs like:
The Best
Only You
I Won’t Let You Go
Past Lives
Pretty Great
One Day
Something About Us
Waiting for You
add flavors of longing, waiting to make a move, ready to pounce. It was a graduation year, after all. Entering into the workforce in a climate like this requires nothing less. Insane levels of grit. This is unsurprising, and you don’t need to know me well to know that. There are also sprinkles of fantasy here. I probably fantasized a little too much this year, but who didn’t? It took me back to when I was five years old and thinking of my future. It’s been a long time since, but my transfer from New York to Houston has re-introduced this crucial aspect of my personality. What will my future look like? What will the future of theatre look like? Where will I live? Where will I work? How much money will I make? What will my home look like? I was thinking about all of this leading up to graduation, but never before so intensely.
Throughout the years, many friends have told me to take some time to be alone— to take some time and reflect. I didn’t know the true meaning of this until March 2020. I’m sure a lot of people had no idea. 23 is probably the most ideal age to learn this lesson. At the same time, 23 is the worst possible time to be isolated from opportunity, friendship, sex, and love.
Ultimately, my Spotify Top Songs 2020 playlist has nothing particularly special to say. It’s incredibly optimistic and, perhaps, too optimistic. It’s future-forward, and it’s definitely too future-focused. At least there is a future, in my eyes.
Here is the link to my unique Spotify 2020 Playlist.
Here is the link to find your own Spotify wrapped information, in case you haven’t explored this feature already.
